There are many different ways parents can teach their children lessons and hold them accountable for their actions. In my practice, when working with adolescents and their families, behavior charts have shown to be pretty effective when followed correctly and used consistently. At times, I have seen consistency be an issue for some, but when this issue occurs, the chart can fall apart in minutes. So, if you are interested in learning more and using one, you must make the commitment to follow it on a daily basis.
The purpose of using a chart is to have your child follow whatever expectations you have of them. Some examples are completing homework, putting away laundry, eating better foods, not arguing with a sibling, not talking back, and anything else that is measurable. The chart will have a point total and each completed task or good behavior will earn a point. If your child does not complete a task or acts out against the chart, i.e. arguing with brother if the chart says not to argue with brother, they will not gain a point. Then, at the end of the week, the points are added up, and a reward (if the amount of points needed are reached are given to your child).
Now, here comes the beautiful part of the behavior chart and I will explain this to you in the easiest way I can (hopefully). Let’s say your chart has an A, B, or C award. The A reward, which would be the highest reward is the biggest one. This can be anything you want it to be. But, including your child in this decision and coming to an agreement can help excite them to follow the chart. The B reward is a bit smaller of a reward and again, is something you can agree with your child on. Now we get to the C reward, which is my favorite part of creating this because if your child did not do well this week, it is a double bonus and you will understand why. I usually create the C reward with something they have, for example, a cell phone or tablet. Let me explain the logic behind this. The C reward is something they have, but just because they have something does not mean they automatically have the rights to it indefinitely. It is a privilege for them to have items or to be able to watch television or play a video game. This reward also avoids punishment, which can be negative at times. Instead of punishing your child for not doing something they were supposed or exhibiting a behavior that you do not like, they are simply not being rewarded with being allowed to use something they already have.
To help make this a little easier for you, I have created a sample behavior chart. If you would like a copy of it, please feel free to email me and I will gladly send you a copy, in addition to answering any questions you may have. If you believe that you child would benefit from working on behaviors with a professional, please call or email to setup an appointment with us.